Caze Quotes

So, I came, I saw, and then I left.  I apologize  to those of you that I did not either give attention to or that I did not see on my trip to the states that was indeed long enough to see the most of you.  I really came to concentrate on giving my focus to my parents and letting them soak as much time as possible with their grandson.

And I hate to say this update will be rather dry as I do not have many pictures with me from my trip...if I get on my game, maybe those will be up later this week.

However, I arrived in August, just in time to be at my brother's wedding which was a blast.  It was without a doubt the fastest ceremony the planet has ever seen, b which I really don't know if that was good or not. I would much perfer short than long though, so I guess it was good. And the party was great...seeing family and whatnot.

Shortly after that I was able to attend my 10 year high school reunion which was really fun and actually  not too awkward for those of us who decided to show.  I just wish more people would've overcome the "wierdness" of it all to join us.

Most of our days were spent at the park with Zeph, or playing with other kids, which was great for him and always a good excuse to get outside.  He and Nicolas Winokur finally became best buddies after about 2 months, so it was sad to see them part.

Other high lights of the trip were getting trips up to Bend, Missoula and Seattle to see beloved friends who are like family to me.  Thank you  all;  I was so blessed by each of you!

We are now all back here in Florianopolis, safe and sound and pretty much adjusted to the time.  Today, we saw a  

It has been a good while since our last update, please accept my apologies.  Life is pretty crazy with a one-year-old running around as many of you know!  And we have really been going througha lot of changes with church and ministry.

As some of you know the church has really had a lot of financial trouble this year.  At one point the leadership prayed about turning the building over to another church , but God did not give us the o.k.  It was not the right time because God was wanting to refine us.  However, now, we are sharing the space with this other church, splitting the bills down the middle.    In this switch God gave us peace about giving up the "main" service time of Sunday evening, and we are now meeting Saturday night with a more evangelistic focus and Sunday mornings as our "main" service.  It has only been two weeks, but it seems to be a good switch.  Of course there has been a few people who have voiced their dislike of waking up early on Sunday, but personally, I am so happy with the change.  Anyway, so we have the space Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and Sunday mornings and the other church has it Wednesdays, Fridays and Sunday evenings.

 As for Claudio, he is feeling the weight of the financial burden being lifted off his shoulders, which reflects in every aspect of his life.    He also continues to work for an açai producing company part-time  which has also been a good distraction for him.

I am doing well, with my hands in little of everything as normal.  Last week the whole family went down to Imbituba (about 2 hours south) to work at the Milan Junior soccer camp that I have worked the past 3 years now.  It felt like vacation for me because my only responsibility was coaching.  Zeph hung out with Claudio or entertained the boys on their free time which gave me free time to swim and read a book and rest. It felt so amazing to have a little break from full-time mom!  Now, I'm feeling the tire again, but Zeph is good company for the most part.

 He is talking, talking, talking!  I can't believe at what he is able to say; he's like a parrot able to repeat so many things! And of course he is walking, walking, walking as well.  I have a couple new videos I need to put up that are so adorable of him...I'll try to do that this week. 

 Other than that, I have been preparing for my trip to the states in a couple weeks.  Zeph and I will be going for my brother's wedding and staying for a while to give the grandparents a good chance to spoil the grandson.  Claudio is planning to come pick us up at the end of the trip and will be there for 2 weeks.  Be praying he doesn't have any trouble entering the country as it will have been more than 6 months since his last visit and they seem to be cracking down a bit.

Love you all!!! 

These past few weeks I have spent a lot of time reflecting over these  5 years here in Brazil.   While overall I would say it has been good, we have encountered a lot of bumps in the road.  And really until I take a step back and see the big picture, I just see bumps. One after the other ..bump, bump, bump.  And that got me to thinking, "how did I get to be the person that sees the glass half empty?" I used to be the person that saw the glass half full."  In other words, I have seen me, myself become this negative and pessamisitc person that "hoped" in God at times, but  didn't really live that day-to-day.

 I used to be that annoying, but encouraging Christian that trusted in God like care-free sheep should . So, how did I get from one side of the pendulum to the other???  Well, over the course of several years, the verses in Revelation 2:4-5 have just picked and picked at me.  Each time that I read them, heard a teaching or preaching on them, my heart would be convicted and I would say "yes", I need to go back to what I was doing before, in my prayer life, in my devotional life with God. I need to go on my prayer walks, etc., etc.  And all that was true. 

 My day-to-day routine was eating away at my joy in Christ.    Slowly my joy diminished into fake smiles at church and a  pessimistic outlook on my circumstances and at times depression! What??? So I would get back into fellowship with my God. I would get into His Word and I would pray and I would go for my coveted prayer walks.  But still , something was missing. I just couldn't reach  that joy that I missed so much. I couldn't get a hold of it.  At times, I would think, oh I got it, just to have it slip away, showing me that something was still missing...But what? I was doing the right things? Do I just not like Brazil? No. I love Brazil.  Have the burdens of ministry really deceived me in some way? No, but they are heavy at times...so what?

 And you know what? I believe I just received my answer.  In an attempt to try and compartmentalize my relationships here between friends and disciples , I denied myself true fellowship.  I was always the one giving advice, counsel, encouragement but never felt "safe" with anyone  to be able to share my struggles, my burdens. My accountability was and still is to trusted and close friends in the states. But I realized how wrong I was just this past week.  And I see now that I have gotten to a point where I can bare my soul with other women.  Since I have opened up a bit I can already see a difference.  I can feel and see my joy, that constant joy, coming back.  I am not there yet, but by God's grace I will get there. I don't believe depression has a place in the believers life, and I will no longer accept mediocrity in my passion for Jesus. In my joy for Him, because of Him.    I am doing the things which I did at first, all of them, in pursuit of He who first loved me and gave Himself for me.